


I Would Kill for You (That's Right)

by emorion



Series: Alex Manes Protection Squad [2]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Alex Manes' Beagle, Bisexual Kyle Valenti, M/M, No Sex, Sorry again, Spoilers for 1x12, alexs beagle, mentions of Michael/Maria, some language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 16:59:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18642298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emorion/pseuds/emorion
Summary: "I'm going to kill him." Kyle muttered under his breath.Alex let out a nervous laugh. "What?""I should have saved some of those barbiturates." Kyle added angrily. "Or the serum. Or maybe I should have just bought the gun. I mean, It was on sale-"





	I Would Kill for You (That's Right)

**Author's Note:**

> So this takes place during/after the finale.  
> if you Haven't read I Tear My Heart Open then some of this might not make sense, so read that one first.  
> Title from One Republic's What You Wanted

Kyle was freaking out. What the hell was he thinking? He just put a man in a coma. A man that he had known his whole life. The man who killed his father, and then tried to pin it on an innocent life form that he had kept in captivity for their entire life. Oh, so maybe that's what he was thinking.

He had to find Alex. Kyle had no idea how he was going to explain all this to his friend. He had no idea how Alex was going to take it.

On one hand, Alex hated Jesse Manes. He was the reason Alex went to war. Jesse was the reason Alex walked away from the love of his life time and time again. He was the reason Alex hated himself and everything his name carried.

On the other hand, Jesse is Alex's father. Kyle almost hated his own father for five seconds inside Caulfield, but he couldn't. Is it really, truly possible to hate the man that raised you, even if he was terrible? Is it possible to hate the man that you are supposed to love just for giving you life? Kyle wasn't in the right mind frame to get philosophical, but if there was any chance that Alex would be upset with him for what he'd done, Kyle needed to consider it. He just got Alex back, he didn't want to lose him again.

Kyle drove to the cabin first. He knocked, but Alex didn't answer, so Kyle used the spare key that Alex gave him in case Kyle ever needed to feed Hayley. As soon as he opened the door, the Beagle was on him, jumping and howling excitedly.

"Hey, girl!" Kyle crooned, squatting to let the puppy shower him with love. It was like an instant stress reliever, but he knew he had to find Alex. "Where's your daddy, Hale?"

Hayley just yipped and chased her tale, so Kyle went and checked the bunker. No sign of Alex.

After feeding and saying goodbye to Hayley, Kyle locked up the cabin and headed to the hospital. Maybe Alex had already heard about Jesse? It was possible someone from the hospital called him. Kyle just hoped he was wrong.

Alex was not at the hospital, but Flint was, and Kyle was lucky he saw Flint before Flint saw him. He hopped back in his car and headed toward the Wild Pony, figuring maybe Alex needed a drink or something after seeing that footage of Jesse. Maybe that's what Kyle should have done, rather than play super doc with a bullet proof vest and a handful of barbiturate filled syringes.

Alex's car wasn't outside the pony, but it was early. Maybe Alex came last night and Maria would know where he was. It was a stretch, but Kyle really didn't know where else to look. The sign said open so Kyle shrugged and opened the door. And guess what? No Alex.

What Kyle did find, however, made him so glad that Alex wasn't here. Alex's best friend caught in an embrace with the love of his life, swapping spit and who knows what else in the middle of the bar. And for the second time that morning, Kyle was lucky not to have been seen. He turned right around and got back to his car without them suspecting a thing.

Alex had said something about Michael possibly moving on. But after Caulfield, all the protectiveness Guerin exhibited for Alex, Kyle had thought they were on the mend. And Alex seemed so hopeful every time he talked about Michael. He was obviously still in love. Did Maria know? She was his best friend, and she was psychic. Kyle knew as soon as he saw those project shepherd files and remembered prom. He was dense, but he figured it out. Surely Maria had, too? But she wouldn't do that to Alex, would she?

Suddenly, Kyle remembered Alex mumbling something about Michael after they watched that footage of... well the footage. He needed to see Michael. With a painful heaviness in his heart, Kyle realized where Alex was.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Alex had been waiting forever when he finally saw a vehicle kicking up dust toward the junkyard. His heart leapt into his throat and he looked down at his clothes, dusting them off to make sure they were perfect. He got up, adjusting his prosthetic, then his jacket, then his hair. When he looked up, he saw that it was not Michael, but Kyle who was now parked and getting out of his truck.

"What are you doing here?" He asked as Kyle approached him.

"I was going to ask you the same thing, actually."

"I'm just waiting for Michael." Alex shrugged. "I came here last night and he told me to come back today so we could talk."

Kyle looked at Alex, then. He was in clothes that reminded Kyle of how Alex used to dress, just matured. Alex looked really good, actually, and not just the clothes. He looked lighter, as if he shed an outer layer of skin that was keeping his true self hidden. And he did all that for Michael, who was currently giving his attention to Alex's best friend.

"I'm going to kill him." Kyle muttered under his breath.

Alex let out a nervous laugh. "What?"

"I should have saved some of those barbiturates." Kyle added angrily. "Or the serum. Or maybe I should have just bought the gun. I mean, It was on sale-"

"Woah!" Alex interrupted, panicked. "Barbiturates? Serum? You were gonna buy a gun?"

Kyle looked at Alex like he just remembered he was there. "I've been looking for you all morning." He said calmly. "There's something- things I need to tell you, but I'm not sure how you'll take them."

Alex raised one of his perfect eyebrows. "Had a big night, Valenti?"

"Just," Kyle scoffed, "Come with me. We shouldn't talk about this here. Where he-" Kyle moved his hand in a vague gesture.

"Wait, is this about Michael?"

"Alex, just get in the car, I'll tell you-"

"Are you the reason he's not here?" Alex asked, frantic. "What did you do to him?"

"Alex!" Kyle yelled. "We can not do this here!"

Alex looked hurt, an expression that Kyle had hoped he would never cause again and knew that he would end up making worse by the end of this discussion. Alex followed Kyle to his car all the same. Kyle waited until they were out of the junkyard to speak.

"I had this feeling that I was being followed ever since we left Caulfield." He began, tentatively. "When I watched the footage. It just. Cemented it in me. I was afraid." He looked over at Alex. "Of Jesse."

Alex nodded. He was relieved that Kyle didn't say "your father."

"So I freaked out," Kyle continued. "Went to buy a gun. And man, I knew it was easy to buy one in these United States, but damn! I had a full on mental breakdown in front of this dude and he offered to give me a discount! This is what's wrong with our country! I almost bought a gun."

Alex looked at Kyle with wide eyes. "But you couldn't."

"I couldn't!" Kyle shouted. "I'm not a guy that buys a gun. I fix people, I dont kill them. It's my code." He shook his head and sighed. "I almost broke my code."

Now it was Alex that shook his head. "But you didn't." He smiled at Kyle when he looked over at him. The small smile that makes Kyle's stomach flip. "What did you do instead?"

"Bullet proof vest. Real Doc Brown of me, I know." Kyle smiled over at Alex. He'd been trying harder with his pop culture references, and if the small laugh it got out of Alex was any indication, his research was paying off.

"But I went to the hospital after that." Kyle continued. "I wanted a plan B. One that I knew I could handle."

"The barbiturates." Alex whispered from beside him.

Kyle nodded. "He snuck up on me in the bunker." He said quietly. "Shot me when I turned around. The vest stopped the bullet, but it hurt like a bitch. And I put on my best Nick Cage and played dead."

Kyle swore he could hear Alex's eyeroll. "He turned away so I hit him in the head and grabbed his gun. I had it pointed at him." Kyle laughed a little. "You wouldn't believe it, Alex, he actually started monologue-ing like a villain from a Band film."

"Bond." Alex corrected.

"Whatever." Kyle said, fired up. "I snapped. I stabbed him in the neck with the needles and injected that son of a bitch with enough barbiturates to keep him under for a long time."

Alex was quiet for a while and when Kyle looked over at him, he had tears in his eyes, but a smile on his face. He looked kind of unhinged. It was definitely working for him.

"He's gone?" Alex let out a wet laugh. "He's not, he's-"

"He's still alive." Kyle offered. "He's at the hospital, on machines. He could wake up."

"Or not?" Alex asked, still laugh-sobbing. "He could not wake up, right?"

Kyle shook his head. "The coma will wear off as the barbiturates do. He'll wake up."

Alex sobbed again. This time with no laugh.

"So he'll wake up and tell them what you did?" Alex gasped. "After he tried to kill you? After he killed your dad? And Michael's mom?"

Kyle shuddered at the mention of Guerin, and unfortunately for him, Alex noticed.

"This isn't about Michael." He said, and curse him for being so damn smart. "Why were you in such a hurry to get out of the junkyard?"

Oh boy. This wasn't going to be fun.

"You said you saw him last night?" Alex nodded, and Kyle sighed. "Ok. What did you say?"

"That's hardly any of your business." Alex tried to deadpan, but he was already too emotional.

"I don't want to pry, Alex." Kyle said, softly. "I just don't have enough facts to know if it's even my place."

Alex looked confused, but he took a deep breath. "I apologized. For leaving him to go to war. I explained why I did it. I told him I wanted to win battles. And I told him that when I look in the mirror, I, I s-see," Alex started to get emotional again, thinking about his father.

"Jesse." Kyle supplemented, feeling deeply saddened by that statement. He looked over at his friend. "You are not your father, Alex. You are kind and compassionate and brave. Jesse Manes is a coward with personal vendettas who attacks things because he doesn't understand them and is too scared to learn."

Alex looked at Kyle with admiration and tears in his eyes, and Kyle took that as encouragement to continue. "All you have ever done is try to love and learn from the things you don't understand, and you deserve much better than what you've been given. Now. Please continue. What happened next."

Alex blinked the tears out of his eyes and nodded. "I told Michael that it felt like I was fighting- Jesse's- battles and not mine. Then he, I don't know, cringed up in pain."

Kyle looked over at Alex, who continued, "He said he had to go. he told me to come back tomorrow and we'd talk. Then he took off."

"And you haven't heard from him since?"

"No." Alex said. "Now can you tell me what's got you all fired up over Michael?"

Fired up was an understatement. Kyle was raging. Alex apologized to Guerin, explained his reasonining, and told him his worst insecurity, and Guerin told him to come back just to stand him up. Because that's what Guerin did. He stood Alex up, and ran to Maria instead. Kyle couldn't believe it. He pulled over.

"He's not worth it." Kyle said, turning toward Alex.

"What?" Alex asked, staring at Kyle. "You saw him at Caulfield, Kyle. He needs someone."

"He stood you up!" Kyle said.

"Maybe something happened last night. To Isobel or Max-"

"Who were you talking about," Kyle interrupted. "The other night at the bunker, who was he moving on with?"

Alex looked like someone slapped him. Kyle could tell he was connecting the dots. Alex was too damn smart for his own good.

"I'm sorry, Alex." Kyle reached for Alex's hand, but aborted. "This morning when I was looking everywhere for you-"

"You checked the Pony." Alex said, realization dawning on his face. "Maria."

Kyle bowed his head. "I'm so sorry."

It was quiet for a while after that. Alex stared out the window, and Kyle tried to get a read on him without staring for too long. When he couldn't, Kyle just stared straight ahead. He knew he should just stay quiet, but he had never been very good at that.

"You know you deserve better."

"I really don't." Alex said. He sounded, resigned. Like he already excepted it. "I blew it."

"You told him you were done walking away." Kyle said vehemently. "You gave him your reasons and apologized and told him you were done walking away."

"If I see Jesse when I look in the mirror, what do you think he sees? My father killed people that were like him, he killed his mother, Kyle!"

"He killed my Father, too!" Kyle yelled. "Jesse Manes killed MY father! And when I look at him, I see a monster!" Kyle took Alex's face between his hands.

"You are ALEX Manes. That's what I see when I look at you. I see the boy who taught me all about UFOs and how to play two player on Game Boy Advance. I see the boy who helped me with my homework because I was to distracted by Vanessa Powell to pay attention in math class. I see the boy who gave me all his best Pokemon cards so I could become a high ranking Pokemon master and beat my arch nemesis, Tommy Crowter. I see a man who never backed down from a fight. With me, with Jesse, in Iraq. I see a man who has tried his best to right every wrong his family has ever committed, even though it isn't your fault at all. You, Alex Manes, are the bravest person I know. And you deserve much better than how everyone is treating you."

Alex was crying openly now, tears streaking his beautiful face. His bottom lip quivered and his eyes were swollen. Kyle stared into his eyes until he nodded. Then, and only then, Kyle let go of his face. He turned back to the steering wheel and drove back onto the road. After a few minutes of driving aimlessly, Alex piped up.

"What now?"

"I have no clue. But I can't go to the hospital right now."

"Why not?"

"Flint' s there."

"The hospital called Flint but not me? Oh my-"

From there, Alex started ranting on and on about being the "black sheep of the Manes family" and Kyle was only half listening, Because Alex didn't sound miserable anymore. He didn't sound happy, either, but he sounded light, like before. Like he was safe from his father and unweighted from the burden of Michael's guilt. And that is all Kyle wanted to be for Alex in that moment. A safe place, free from the weight of the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah i named Alex's beagle after Hayley Williams from Paramore.  
> 


End file.
